Wednesday, November 12, 2008

See, I told ya!

Ya, ya, ya. Just like a child, I know. But things get busy, life happens and all of a sudden it is a week later and I haven't posted. I'm still interested, that's exciting.

Our move went a lot worse than we anticipated. We had amazing help from our friends and neighbors at the apartment, loading the truck. They were so patient while I was so unprepared. We ended up moving a week earlier than expected because, remember that job interview .... I got it!! YAY. Unfortunately, though, they told me Friday afternoon and I started training the next Monday, giving me half a day to reserve a truck, find help, finish boxing and get "prepared." I did the best I could, guys. Stayed up late, put everything else off ... rough. Anyway, so we moved to the new house and Oh! Thank Heaven, for Darrell, he was so awesome to follow us to the new house and help unload the truck, too. He was the first to help and the last to leave. I really appreciated him and his wife for letting us borrow him. At the new house, we didn't have any neighbors show to help, even though my mom said she tried to find people. One guy showed half an hour to the end and helped. I was grateful for anything I could get, but man, what a slap in the face - we were no longer in Kansas, Toto!! The student housing neighbors always saw a need (moving, mostly) and were most often willing to drop everything and dig their heels in to help those moving (in or out!!). Now we are "big girls and boys" and on our own in the lone and dreary world. Our first experience was the pity Darrell had for us to help us unload, too. Thanks again, man. You are my hero, well, you can vie for second place, my husband is hogging first and second. hehehehe

My husband is very allergic to animals. So much so that we could hardly ever visit my mother's house. Within three feet of the front door his asthma and allergies would flair up so badly that we had to stop coming over or drug him droopy. I've been over at mother's house helping her clear it out, clean it and SCRUB it for my neurotic, with cause, husband. Well, it wasn't enough. We had to sleep at a hotel our first night. Great for us, alone time, FINALLY, but we spent the night writing a talk we were assigned to give at our church the next day. It was way nice, though to not have to worry about this and that, the kids (stayed at Gma's) and have a clean, beautiful and soft place to sleep. The next day we rented a carpet cleaner from Home Depot (watch it, they can get expensive) and spent the next three days deep cleaning the carpets. His reactions slowly drifted away, but they are not gone.

The agreement prior to moving into the house was that the animals would be gone within a minimum of thirty days of our move-in so we could sanitize the house of all catness or dogness. It helped A LOT. We got the ducts cleaned, carpets cleaned (by a crappy company that didn't do much), vaccumed, dusted, washed walls, cleared all furniture and house ... stuff out to make it as dander free as possible. Yet, all that work, and I still had to worry about the untimely death of the hubby. Now it has been five days, we are cozy in our bedroom, surrounded by boxes as each room dries from the carpet cleaner and pet-ness is still not totally gone. Their happiness (or unhappiness, whichever way you want to look at it) has deeply saturated into the padding and subfloors of the carpet. We will probably end up having to replace the subflooring, padding and parts of the carpet, if possible. But for now, we will make it liveable and be content.

This house, mind you, did just fall into our laps. We must be grateful for the opportunity to try our skills at homeownership, even if it isn't the real thing. Now, you may be wondering, why the heck, knowing the pet-ness that was left, the work that was put in BEFORE this house was even possibly ours, etc. we would still move in ... well, this move wasn't about us. It is about MOM. It is a move that is more money for rent, utilities, gas and house repairs, but it is something we, as a family have pondered and saught guidance for. It is a move that we feel is right and serves a purpose, for whom we still don't know, but ultimately, for MOM. She is retiring, couldn't sell the house for CLOSE to what she owed, couldn't afford the payments and couldn't afford to fix it. That is where we come in. Our hearts have put so much work into the house, why not call it ours? Finish the basement, remodel the kitchen, bathroom, finish the other bathroom and bedroom, re-landscape, replace the carpet, fix doors, plumbing, and anything else we don't, yet know about so we CAN get this house re-sellable and help the MOM retire is all we are thinking about for this move. I had to get a job, found one out of the home, re-balance our existence, but again, it is what we feel is right.

Why am I telling you this? Well, I think it is because I need to hear it, too. I need to be reminded of our why. Our why might change later, but this is our motivation and my need to understand why we do things is now expressed on "paper." So far, the move hasn't been worth it. I am a person that needs to have stability. Living between two homes, balancing a new job, childcare, a husband in full time school and working part time, having only one car, not knowing neighbors that might be willing to help, cleaning up one place to leave and cleaning up another place DEEPLY to live, finishing my obligations at my previous pseudo-job and RAship, keeping up with homeschool and remembering my own classes creates chaos. Something that is most unstable and makes me very anxious. All in all, though, I feel like I've done the best I can, fulfilled my obligations, kept my head on and my feet straight, and hopefully with some grace and dignity, next week will be better.

I took pics of the chaos that we are living in, wall to wall CRAMMED with MOM's stuff to leave, our stuff to find places for, and enough path for us to find the beds and the bathroom by. I will post them when I figure out how as well as the miraculous difference that will be this home, aesthetically, when I can breath again and do with it what I will. Until then, wish me luck.

4 comments:

Brad and Theresa said...

Kudos, for handling the stress better than I could. I remember when we moved on the same day I had Emilee, Brad was VERY miserable, the kids were so so.. My nurse in the hospital saw our apt and said it was wall-to-wall boxes in the living room. It took us about 4 months to finally put everything away. I wish you guys luck on finding homes for everything, but I know you can make it work.
Congrats on the job. Are you excited? I does take some re-getting used to, when you haven't worked outside of the home in a while.
I love ya tonz. Luv, Theresa

Melissa said...

You are so motivated and driven! I look up to you.

Congrats on the new job and also becoming a home owner.

Moving I think is around just to make people crazy. I have lived in my house since the beginning of Sept and I am still unpacking.

I cant wait to see pictures. I will need to come over soon too.

Love ya and talk to you soon.

Swenson Family said...

Wow- Sheila, you are amazing. Do you need help cleaning your apartment today? Let me know what I can do to help, even if that means being a model students. :) Thanks for all of your help and training. :)

Patricia Potts said...

Shiela,
Truly my heart goes out to you. How hard! I know what you mean by stability. I crave the feeling of knowing the basic outline of Sun.-Sat.

I have a friend who recently agreed to hav a wedding reception in her back yard. It turned into a majoy overhaul, remodeling etc. She said she got through it be "visualizing a green stamp" booklet that was filled with green stamps she earned by shopping at S&W then used to buy things she wanted.
Anyway, everytime another stressful thing happened she mentally stuck another stamp in her booklet. By the time the reception was over she looked at everything and turned in her stamps for a lovely home.
Sorry such a long commment.
Love,
Patricia