What time is it?

One of these mornings I'll wake up in a daze and ask "what time is it?" as I gaze at the half dead husband drooling on his pillow to my side with (thanks to Mom) a pillow over his head. Unfortunately, that won't be for - what, another 35 years until retirement, minus 3 kids (at minimum), plus 18 years until they head out of the nest ... well, you understand the math. HOWEVER, until that time, I'm enjoying the ride!

Now that I'm done catching up with everyone, I suppose I'll catch up, too. We've had a great summer. Stressful, unbalanced, lazy, fun. We haven't gotten to have a lot of weekends or nights or days together. I'm so much better of an at-home mom during the summer, places to go, weather to soak up. But, I went and got a job at the brink of summer. No problem, makes the heart go fonder.

In July we made two trips to St. George. One for the Fourth of July which we got to spend in St George and Las Vegas with my best friend. The other with just my sister enjoying a girl's weekend getaway hiking, resting, playing.

At the beginning of August the four of us were FINALLY in the same house for the same 2-day weekend! That almost NEVER happens. Either Dylan is at his one-dad's or Darin is working. Neither have the same schedule. So, for the first day in a long time we were together, we went swimming and enjoyed our time together. Of course all my pictures are still on my camera and thus, no fun pics of children smiling and parents happy. :D Those to come!

Where to start?

It has been a long time since I've posted. Where do I start? So much has happened. We'll start with the kids. That's the fun part anyway.

Dylan is well. He's enjoying, neigh, LOVING his days with his best friend, Tyler. He's enjoying the last couple weeks off of school. He's finally done with soccer. He's so funny, he says he wants to play soccer, but he gets out there and dances or goofs off or tells the coach, "I'm so tired, I need a rest" from what? Lol. However, he has made some show of promise. He runs fast! When his head is in the game, he gets back to the goal to help keep the ball away. He seems to get the idea of the game. But his age? Attention span? Whatever, makes the game very unpredictable. Each season we ask him what he wants to play. He says he wants to play soccer - we'll see if he wants to next season.

Abigail is great. She is learning the art of dirty looks and temper-tantrums. With lots of love and redirection, though, I have hope. She is a great walker, totally clumsy. She often walks into things or falls down, inner ear problem, maybe? She says (and signs) lots of words: ball, bottle, bye, shoe, food, up, hi, I love you, more, milk, all done, dad, mom, brother, etc. Of course, these words are not completely articulate, but her garbles can be distinguished when she points and when she says it back to you. She also knows where her nose is, eyes are and ears are. She climbs stairs and slides down them! I just love this age. It is so fun. She runs away as fast as she can and it looks so funny and awkward, but way cute. She has learned to dribble a soccer ball from Dylan's soccer games.

Darin is having WAY too much fun this summer. He is so funny. He has no school, ended last semester wonderfully, passed all his classes and is just high on the excitement. He has been a bad influence on my homework productivity this summer. However, he's having fun with his games, his projects, his kids and keeping up with small house projects. He's a wonderful man and husband and even though I only get to see him about an hour or two a day, it has been great to see him with so much less stress.

As for me ... I'm working on a certain zen-factor.

All in all, that is what is going on with us. We are trying to enjoy the time we have and the summer sun (come out, come out where ever you are).

Holding on to the moment

I've learned school kicks my butt over and over and over again. I LOVE to learn, I love going to school, but I could very much so deal without the painful reminder of the roller coaster ride. However, now .... all I have to do when new terms kicks my butt (and this one has the last couple week) is remember, "I GOT A 99.5%, I GOT A 99.5%, I GOT A 99.5% HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!!!" (thank you Little Rascals).

I have NEVER gotten such a high A+ before. So many people can pull off high grades, jobs and family all at the same time. Some are married, some single parents, some emmersed in other curricular activities. Whatever the case, I learned from grade 9 after giving up on school in grade 6 that I am just not a stellar or star student. While I try HARD and work HARD at it, I still barely pass with both grade and comprehension. It's a skill I could've acquired given nurturing and practice, but did not. Now, older and less wiser, I am the dog that is learning new tricks.

One trick of which - Darin taught me - outline my notes. He doesn't just mean take notes, but instead outline the notes. It has helped so much. Also, I just recently learned this, write down your thoughts WHEN they come to you and where in the text you thought them. These thoughts should be as complete as possible so when you go back to grab the idea in a relevant situation, the thought makes sense.

"I GOT A 99.5%, I GOT A 99.5%, I GOT A 99.5% HEY, HEY, HEY, HEY!!!" YIPPEEE.

The Dog is the only one not adjusting

Another week has gone by and we are figuring out this whole balance thing. Homeschool is on a different track right now. With Dylan being three years ahead of his class as it is, I'm not so worried about it. I'm slowly getting caught up with my school work and the kids, it's like nothing ever changed. I love that about kids - simple, easy, adjustable.

Dylan is great. He is LOVING the babysitters. Everyday he asks "Are we going to Tyler's house?" "Are we going to my best friend's house?" I think we made the right decision there. Abigail is great, too. She loves going over there as well. It is a great place - quiet, just for kids, lots of fun, happy. Not like my house lately - mess!! to-do lists everywhere! Stressed out Mom and busy Dad who is picking up the slack until things can settle down - whenever that may be. ARGH. The Dog; however, is not adjusting. For being alone during the day she is GREAT. But man, she won't listen to save her life (literally). She is losing her trained dog-style and is just getting to be work. So sad. I was afraid of that, though.

Memorial Day is this weekend. YAY. Three day weekend off work. Sadly, Darin has to work Saturday so my blissful alone weekend we planned so I can get caught up with everything isn't going to happen. I'll get Monday, though. If that is enough. We'll see.

One thing I have had solidified, I am a worker-bee. I love to work. I love to get out of the house. I love being a Mom, but if I can do both - perfection! The juggling act is the hard part. That will take some time, though. I know that and am okay with it.

Ridiculously Late

I'm not just saying the space between blog entries is ridiculously late, but the fact that I'm still awake a couple hours past the time I wanted to go to sleep is ridiculously late. I did it to myself, though. I love the shift I work. I can have a productive, fun, good morning with my kids, we eat lunch. What would have been our rest time and then a nice quiet afternoon until Dad comes home the kids now get to go to a neighbor's house with kids their age and play or have rest time there and play again until Dad comes and gets them. After my shift, I come home, tuck the kids in bed, hang out with my husband and enjoy an evening of wind down time, which normally consists of watching movies or TV shows - our latest crave is Chuck on NBC. After a whole week of not going to bed at my "should be" bed time, 10pm, I now can't sleep. Argh. Aside from that, though. I am finding it is harder to keep up with my school work, let alone blogging. So now, I am ridiculously late on my first assignments due this week (well, Wednesday). Argh, again. How to find the balance. Time management, money management, why don't they teach these things in school? Well, maybe they did, but out of the thirteen (yes, 13) schools I went to before graduating high school, I was never taught these skills - let alone cooking or the famous baby handling, or is it egg handling? Anyway, all in due time, right?

MOMs

Today is officially Mom's Special Day - Hallmark's dedicated day for Moms - and DARN IT(!), they were right to do so. Do you know how hard YOU work? Your Mom? Any Mom? Goodness me. I do.

Growing up without a Dad, psychologists say I would have "Daddy issues" but lucky me, I got Mom's to help me balance out. Mom's are awesome. I recommend that EVERYONE should have as many mom's as I do. This may sound weird, but I don't care. It just means that I have more than one person that I can call in a crisis and cry to, laugh with or just get advice from. It's pretty neat to have. I have my saintly mother-in-law, my wise biological mom, my fun-loving step-mother and my incredibly thoughtful (other) step-mother. Not to mention all the support, advice, examples and love I've received over the years from all the other mothers I've known, adopted for a moment or have just heard.

It took me becoming an at-home mom to really understand the divine purpose of motherhood and our special qualities. You don't even have to have children to understand this or to have these qualities. I was very fortunate for this learning and growing opportunity. Unfortunately, I am a mother who can't stay an at-home mom forever. As my neighbor says, "Some people just need to work. You need to work." It balances me out and puts things in better perspective for me. I need it.

As for my Mother's Day weekend, I got to spend lots of time with my husband and children. I got to do yard work, watch my son play soccer, make new and (hopefully) lasting friends with my husband's childhood (pseudo) aunt and go to church to be uplifted and renewed in my perspectives and spirit. Specifically, for Mother's Day, I got to my favorite game (and I got to play it FOUR times already) - KILLER BUNNIES!!! I got to eat my favorite dinner (of the moment) - grilled chicken salad sandwiches. I got to watch one of my favorite movies - Ironman. At church the mom's were given little potting flowers. I got to talk to my mother's and I got handmade cards from my kids!!

My Journey from Darkness to Light

Depression affects everyone. Whether you admit it or not. You could be the one with depression, or the one that helps a loved one get through it. You could have parents, children or friends that suffer from depression. It is a black hole of emotional spiraling. The hardest emotion to overcome and to avoid. It can creep up on you, attack at any moment, be brought on by the smallest thing or just happen over night. It is one of life's greatest challenges. Many people who work or are at-home mothers, men and children get depression. There is no cure-all, but ... there is a resource.

One of the most thoughtful books I have read on depression is called My Journey from Darkness to Light by Patricia Tew Potts. It is compiled with love and honesty. Together with the Holy Spirit, she has compiled some of the most important things that contribute to and help with overcoming depression. It is not a permanent fix. Life constantly is throwing at us those curve balls that make repetition necessary and the discovery of the known required for our constant learning. Patricia offers many ideas to aid in your recovery and in learning about yourself so you may recognize when and what triggers depression in your life. She emphasizes excercise (mentally and physcially) and positive thoughts.

I highly recommend this book to anyone that can read. Whether or not you, yourself suffers from depression or mental illness, it is a wonderful tool and help. It's companion, First Aid for Feelings compiled by Patricia Tew Potts is a must for those moments on-the-go that uplifting thoughts, scriptures and messages are needed. It is a perfect fit for your purse, travel bag or backpack. It is a great study tool with prayer for when you need a quiet pull-it-together moment. Each book is on sale at amazon.com, patriciapotts.com or contact me for your copy. My Journey from Darkness to Light is only $16.03 with tax and First Aid for Feelings is only $10.69 with tax. Each are invaluable. Your $26.72 will be worth so much more after you are able to read the book and use the companion tool.